SPEAK: Connect By the Spirit – Finding Your Tribe

SPEAK! … By the Spirit™ with
Erica A. Hawthorne

Finding Your Tribe

© 2011 Erica A. Hawthorne

April 2, 2011

When tribes gather in the same place, the opportunities for mutual inspiration can become intense.  In all domains, there have been powerful groupings of people who have driven innovation through their influence on each other and the impetus they’ve created as a group.
-Sir Ken Robinson, The Element: How Finding Your Passion Changes Everything

It is true that at the center most part, we are all connected, multiple parts of a collective whole.  This is never more apparent than when we connect with other like-minded people who ignite and inspire us towards our purpose and potential.  It is that spark, that act of linking together, that can become a catalyst for working towards a common goal that also fulfills our individual purposes.

By the Spirit as a website and blog, came into being by a group of women of similar spiritual and creative passions.  The idea for BTS was merely the outcome of the connection between us through friendship and love.  Our individual accomplishments and experiences as counselors, writers and performance artists merged to create what is now a space of spiritual encouragement and personal growth for ourselves as well as our readers.  As Sir Ken Robinson states, we found our “tribe”.

You may belong to many tribes at one time or within your lifetime.  You may find your tribe by joining a cause, or attending a group outing.  But the significance of connecting with others in this manner, is that something much bigger than any of you individually, is created by this coming together.

The driving energy of the tribe is activated when all participants work within their strengths and share that with the group as whole individuals.

The beautiful part of this kind of connection is that it calls for your whole self to show up and be present in order to move the group and its purpose forward. Through this connection, many are challenged and encouraged to do above and beyond what they were able to accomplish on their own, but this does not take away from each person’s potential to have always been able to do so.  The ingredients and materials are always present and within us, the coming together simply provides another kind of catalyst to bring them forth.

So, how do we find our tribes?

Many of us are already part of a divine group of others that are inspiring them towards greatness and creating wonderful things for our community and world.

If you are already part of a tribe, it’s important to recognize how blessed a connection like this is.  Being a part of a group like this grows when its participants:

  • communicate openly and authentic with one another (even if it results in disagreements sometimes),
  • bring their best selves to the task,
  • are unafraid to take risk,
  • challenge one another and
  • if necessary, be willing to start over again by making new agreements or changing course.

If you feel like you don’t have a tribe and you’d like to, consider the following actions that will help you prepare for this connection:

Continue to work towards your purpose

Many tribes are made up of people in progress. They are currently “running the race” or working towards their goals. It not important whether they’ve made it or not, just that they are participating in the process.  So, don’t check out! In order to be connected to others you must remain connected to yourself and your process.

Be open & flexible

Sounds simple enough, but tribes are created from the willingness of those in the group to be connected.  They choose to prioritize the collective’s needs or projects, they take initiative to follow up and bring new information to the group.  It also means allowing others into your “space”.

Sometimes we become very protective of our ideas, fearful that if we bring them to the collective process, they will somehow be limited or altered in ways we are uncomfortable with. But it can also mean having an idea embraced to become more fully developed or edited in a way that brings its best parts to life.  It’s an ongoing practice of malleability. BTS would have never come into being if each member was determined to remain individual in thought or unwilling to adjust our approach to the project.

Be willing to go deeper

Many of us honestly and understandably fear connecting in this way, afraid that it will take away from our needs or other projects and interests or leave us exposed to the potential of disappointment.  Sometimes we displace our fears and our bad habits onto the very things meant to be of support.  Be willing to seeing these things about ourselves and dealing with them as they come up.  Now is the time to uncover and unearth and heal them.

Besides, being part of a tribe will require that your most authentic self show up at all times, and when it doesn’t, many times part of the process of being in a tribe is challenging you to dig deeper and bring this out, even though the group may not know that is what they are doing for one another.

Trust the Spirit

When you are connected with Spirit, you never have to worry about being too vulnerable or taken advantage of (common fears and deterrents to connecting with others).  Even if the group is not by design a spiritually focused group (band, book club, work team, etc.), you are a spiritual being, and you can bring your spiritual practice and centeredness to the group.  Trust that everywhere you are, with every person you meet, that it is an opportunity for Spirit to work towards the good of your purpose.  Ask for guidance, trust the process.

Many well-meaning tribes break up when a significant number in the group are unwilling or unable to embrace these practices.  If you do these things now, you will be able to bring them into your interactions with the group and do so from your empowered self that is not afraid of the risk of connection because you have practiced self-care and understand the benefits of connecting with your “tribe”.

This week, and beyond, be willing to Connect By the Spirit and enjoy the process of being part of a tribe that brings forth the good and purposeful things in our life!

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One Response

  1. LOVE this!!! Thank you so much Erica!

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