SPEAK: Speak By the Spirit – When Words Are Not Enough

SPEAK! … By the Spirit™ with
Erica A. Hawthorne

When Words Are Not Enough

© 2010 Erica A. Hawthorne

November 15, 2010

Over the past two weeks I’ve had two friends lose loved ones very close to them.  During the same time, a family member went through a major surgery for a life-threatening disease.  Immediately after hearing the news of the above circumstances, I found myself verbally crippled…without right verse or endearing word to say.  I know this month is dedicated to our desire and ability to SPEAK by the Spirit, but what do we do when the words become stuck in our grief, lodged so stalwartly in the shock of it all…what then?

I remember talking with a friend once who said his first memory was at 4 or 5 months old when his mother took him to a local rec center for a swim class for babies.  He distinctly remembered colors worn by people around him and the feeling of being afraid of the uncertainty around what was happening.  He said he even remembered thinking “What is going on?” and being further concerned once he went under water.  He said he was afraid of pools until he was five years old and quite surprised his mother with the memory of it all, to which his mother much later in life confirmed the details that he spoke about.

I sat fascinated by his story and I wondered ‘how did he understand and translate his feelings into words he did not yet have access to?’  Does this lend to the proof that there is a greater form of communication that precedes words?  And if so, then this must mean that there is a whole other level of communication that we can in fact engage even as adults.

With that awareness, I realized that in moments of “frozen grief” I can take a moment and go to a place within where there are words beyond words.  I’ve learned to sit with the feeling of it all, hold it there for a moment, and with a prayer in my heart, let the words come from a place much deeper…a place where words exist as feelings and wishes of well-being. Many times tears during this practice are inevitable, and to me, even those communicate a greater and more deeply felt emotion.

As I sat through the funeral of my friend’s one-year daughter, I held this practice in my heart throughout the program.  When the time finally came to approach her and give condolences, I said nothing.  Instead I held her, breathed in harmony with her for a moment, took a moment to connect with her eye to eye, smiled and gave her hand a gentle squeeze.  All that needed to be said was expressed in that moment.  I’m convinced that what was spoken in that moment went beyond words and straight to her spirit.

Sometimes the SPEAKing comes so direct through and by the Spirit that words are not enough, and instead we must rely on the language we’ve all known since and before our birth.  It is there that the greatest communication takes place where the language of the heart is felt and understood.



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